September 7, 2012

What if I lose in love?


It's no secret I've been unlucky in love.  Heck, I've been beat up and tossed away like last night's left overs when It comes to the subject matter.  I've been left stranded when it comes to finding a partner to two-step with.  It's like being in 6th grade PE class and being the last kid picked for kick ball, which in my case, was every time. Except, in my case now, I'm not being picked.  I'm sitting these last few innings out.  I've got the itch to jump in the game and score, but it is like the coaches have other plans for me. 


In my last post I wrote about Tossing the Bed Covers and waking up each morning on the bright side.  Looking at the day as half full.  Awaking with a smile and asking the day to hug me tightly and be kind to me. And today, I did just that.  I had an extra spring in my step as I crawled out from the covers and went to make the pot of decaf coffee.

So why is it that time after time boys will arrange to make plans with me and then leave me hanging? Why is it that when a certain friend from out of town asks to spend time with me over the weekend he leaves me with no follow-up calls, texts, emails when he arrives in town.  Two days go by with no word.  He's gone radio silent.  Evaporated.  

To make matters more dramatic, because that's what I do, I have been registered on an online dating site for most of this summer.  I've had 0 dates.  Niltch.  Nada.  Goose egg.  I'm getting matches from people 400 miles away which doesn't exactly warrant a quick coffee meet-up.  To add fuel to the fire (remember I'm dramatic), I wink, email and reach out to gents on the site.  I get nothing back.  It's like I wasn't meant to really date.  To find love.  To find my forever compadre.

I won't give up.  I simply can't.  If I gave up on love, isn't that like giving up on life? 


14 comments:

  1. Amen sister. I am in the same boat and don't get it. But here's to keeping the faith and hanging in there!

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  2. Don't give up, friend...let's keep each other accountable for staying in fight!

    PS - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ

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    1. I suppose I'll fight to the bitter end, huh?

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  3. I am right here with you on this. I feel like I used up all my love luck on bad relationships prior to this, and now I'm being punished with this enforced period of nothing working. I want to date, but I can't seem to find anyone to date.

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    1. I haven't even had that many relationships...so what gives? I guess good things come to those who wait? I feel like I've been waiting my entire life.

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  4. Don't give up. I am sure you'll find someone. There are still nice guys out there.

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    1. Maybe I should move to OK and find me a nice gent. If you find one, send him my way.

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  5. I'm sorry you are so frustrated. It sucks. I think it's really good that you're trying--you're putting yourself out there--cause that is all you can do. For the record, I don't think you will lose in love. I just think you're getting a supreme test in faith and patience while waiting.

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  7. my friend is going through the same thing. she's such an awesome person but has a hard time finding love. she thinks it's because guys in our age group (mid-30s) are either divorced with baggage, gay or the ones who aren't married are just about to be or are in serious relationships already.

    i'm sorry you're going through this. you'll meet someone when you least expect it.

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  8. This sounds like a low point, and it sucks. I just read a blog that said don't forget the low points because they really show you how much the high points are worth later. You'll get through this.

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  9. UGH! I hate this so badly. I know there's nothing anyone can say to make it better, nor are you probably really looking for something to. It's so cliche to say, all of this will be worth it when your guy finally comes. It's massively frustrating, but I have full faith that it is so true. I know without a shadow of a doubt that when my TRUE Mr. Right comes, the one who won't ditch me, stand me up, leave me, treat me with disrespect, abuse me, cheat on me, etc., it will mean absolutely everything to me. It will make all of the pain I've endured so, so worth it.

    The online dating thing is a mystery to me. While it's true, the guy I'm currently seeing is thanks to Match, I talked to MAYBE 2% of the guys I had some sort of communication with...and my guy now was one of them...so basically zilch.

    I wish I had some sort of something to cheer you up, encourage you, or make you feel better about the whole thing. I don't. Just know that someday, someone WILL come around to appreciate you, love you for who you are, and never, ever leave.

    xo

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  10. Do not give up, girl! Still following along on your posts and adventures. It's always refreshing to read your humor in it all. Dating can be many things - and staying positive and laughing things off will make even the disappointments and mistakes worthwhile in the end. You'll find that good guy someday soon ;)

    xx

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