Microwave down - call 911

My microwave crapped out.  Let’s hash this phenomonen out together, shall we?

I live alone.

I don’t heat up family-size Stouffers lasagna trays in my microwave for 20-minutes at a time.  (Seriously people, gross....sodium, fake meat, shall I go on?).

I don’t exclusively use it to “cook”.  Thanks to the Williams Sonoma catalog, I do get spontaneous bursts of inspiration to actually cook with expensive utensils and dishes.  My concoctions may taste like disgusting messes of a pile of ingredients, but I do attempt to utilize the oven and stove.

I didn’t throw a hot dog in there and zap it into a piece of un-edible leather.  Don't get me started on hotdogs...another tragic invention of disgusting meat by-product. 

The microwave is less than 5 years old.

I’ve hit the wall of “Holy heck, home ownership is often tragic.  Why don’t people warn new homeowners of such a thing?!”

I feel like I’m living in a tent in the midst of an African prairie with no access to electricity.  Perhaps my analogy is a wee bit exaggerated, but my microwave CRAPPED OUT folks, and in today’s world, that’s like ordering a burger and not the fries.  It just doesn’t happen.

Who do you call to rectify such a problem?  Is there such a person as Mr. Microwave Repair Guy?

I mean, I can stand a cold shower if my hot water tank were to fail.  But what’s a girl to do when her coffee needs to be zapped?  Or how do you melt your 3PM snack of cheese on Triscuits without a microwave?

I’m American Bridget and having a microwave down is like asking the Pope to pass on a morning benediction.  It’s just sort of tragic.

Cabernet makes everything all better.

I’ve been absent for a month.  Let's get to the point of this post because no one needs to hear me rant like everyone else in the blog world about how they've lost their bloggy-blog mojo, how they feel so uninspired, etc.  We don't need another post like that.  What we need is humor.  And love.  And a good pair of heels.  And chocolate.  And a good, oak Cabernet.  Because Cabernet makes everything better.  Except, when you chase the Cabernet with a vodka.  Then you're just staring down the toilet pipes and staring death in the face.

Here’s what I have NOT been doing:

1.     Watching TV.

2.     Eating bread (pizza crust does not count).  For some reason I gave up bread during Lent and I’ve just let that habit continue on.  I’ve also given the boot to white rice and potatoes.  But (and that’s a big ass BUTT… Chantilly cake from Whole Foods remains an important and necessary dessert every so often Thank you Leila).

3.     Getting a tan in preparation for my departure to the archipelago of Hawaii.

4.     Getting into bathing suit-ready shape in preparation for seven glorious days of beach bumming around.

Here’s what I HAVE been doing:

1.     Working my arse off.  Unfortunately this has not yielded in a smaller posterior.  This is quite unfortunate for the two new bathing suits I was gifted for my 37^th birthday.  Work is in the midst of a tornado (bad joke?) of fury. But, I’d rather be revved up with producing commercials than sitting around in the unemployment line. 

2.     Running.  I continue to run, though it has been sluggish since I am just coming off a running-induced injury at the end of April.

3.     Juicing.  I’m on the proverbial propaganda bandwagon.  I’m freakishly obsessed with my Breville juicer and can’t quite contain myself when those two times of day I prepare my fruits and veggies into a glorious slurpee of vegetative goodness.  There’s nothing more fascinating than watching kale and spinach get chopped up into micro-sized pieces and watching drops of juice spit out for consumption.  Drops people.  Drip.  Drip.   Drip....Drop. It’s called living life on the edge.

4.     I’ve spent more time with my special friend.  We’re still growing together as a couple, testing the waters, learning, laughing and in the blissful state of dating.   Our schedules often don’t align, but when they do, I consider myself one lucky soul for having him in my life and count my blessing each night.  Fist pumping the good Lord above for hooking this gal up. 

This time last year and the year prior I was blogging about bad first dates, disgusting creepers and the misfortune of online dating.  This year I don’t necessarily have those Carrie Bradshaw-esque stories to tell, but I will leave you with my most recent self portrait after a hard days work.  You’re welcome.  I don't really post personal pictures on here.  No reason behind it, but not into over-divulging you with my f-a-c-e left, right and center.

And if you need a boost of cuteness for the week, no one tires of looking at this cutie.  I’ll go ahead and brag.  She’s related to me.  That’s some good DNA right there.  Again, you're welcome.

 White bonnets make the world a better place.  

So do cupcake pink pants.

 

People and things that need to go away

Amanada Bynes.  Stop the twit pics.  I'm not even on Twitter and still I get bombarded by them in my other social media feeds, Yahoo! feeds, OMG! feeds, etc. STOP.

Lindsay Lohan.  I’m tired of being exposed to this train wreck of a shell of a person as well.  Doesn’t jail sober people up?  Come on LA, just lock the girl up.

Kim K’s baby bump in clothes which are too tight.  I get it.  We all get it.  You’re pregnant and proud.  And Kanye is the baby daddy.  Let’s not strut all over the world and show off the bump(s) every waking chance.

 Via

The Kardashians in general. If we had to create a time capsule of today’s current events and open them up in 100 years, I would be really embarrassed for our generational need for this family.

Cancer.  So tired of learning of friends falling victim to it.

Richard Simmons short shorts.  Enough already.  We’ve had to witness his fuzz hair hanging out of his shorts for decades now.  Stop.\

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Rhianna and Chris Brown.  Are they or aren't they.  I lost my care factor months ago.  We’re all over it.  Just break up for good and let’s call a truce with the entire world who is also over it.

Mama June’s camo wedding dress.  DE-GUST-ING.  All for show.  Not love.  Just show.  Come on.

Via

Sugar Bear looks miserable.  And is that cake icing on her chin(s)?

The fact that I am even typing about this shit fest bothers me.

Raid my closet

I used to be a clothes horse.  And, then I began working from home in 2008 and the need for business attire and fancy work outfits went to the wayside in exchange for unlimited cups of my own brewed decaf coffee, the omission of ridiculous office get togethers and the dismissal of those never-ending conference room meetings.  The first four years of my career I spent in business suits and nice business attire which never satisfied my bank account or credit card statements given I was poor as dirt and needed to dress "the part".  The last 12 years of my career have been more business casual.  And let's not kid ourselves when admitting that the last couple of years have been spent in yoga pants and hoodies hiding behind a keyboard, audio IM and the iPhone.

As I continue to think about my evolving wardrobe, I realize I change my mind on clothes about as often as I change my decision if I am team Aniston or team Jolie-Pitt (which is often).

So I signed up for Poshmark (find me here).  I downloaded the app a few months ago but was gun shy about actually merchandising my schtuff.  If I had the time I would plan out outfits and accessorize the photos, but I have a full-time job that keeps me punching the clock well over 50-hours a week, a house to take care of and three little canine mouths that are constantly begging me for scooby snacks and kibble.

So, instead I just threw the nice clothes that have been in my closet without being worn in a while on a hanger and threw down some iPhone pics.  

 https://poshmark.com/closet/americanbridget

 https://poshmark.com/closet/americanbridget

 https://poshmark.com/closet/americanbridget

 https://poshmark.com/closet/americanbridget

 https://poshmark.com/closet/americanbridget

Just because I can, here's a picture of the most adorable blondie to start your week off with a little sprinkling of sweetness. 

You're welcome.

I can see clearly now....thanks to FIRMOO

I've never done a sponsored post before and turned down offers over the last couple of years to do so.  It's just not my thing.

Until now.

I've been wearing corrective lenses for about 20 years now.  Of those years I've been in contacts for about 10 of them.  Lately, my eyes have gotten more sensitive and I've been leaning on my glasses a lot more for day-to-day activities, especially when it comes to sitting behind my computer at work all day.

Enter Firmoo.  A great site that offers up virtual try-on system that lets you select a face shape, size, etc.  You enter in your prescription, head, eye measurements, etc. and then place your order.  It's easy, stress free and the prices are perfect for those of us always on a budget.   Or, if you have a great head shot of yourself, you can virtually try glasses on that route as well. 

I found the site to be an easy-breezy shopping experience and placing my order was pain free.  Better yet, it didn't take long for my shipment to arrive and when it did, I found the hard case and lens cloth to be of good quality as well.

If you have the desire to step out of your comfort zone and try some glasses that are a bit more of a trend but you're not comfortable plopping down a couple hundred George Washingtons to do so, Firmoo is a great solution.

I found my pair quickly and used the virtual try-on to make my final selection.  Again, quite easy and their prices can't be beat.

Firmoo is offering readers of mine the opportunity to try new glasses as well.  Follow this link for details.

The old opinion that glasses are only necessities for people with vision problems has already gone. Glasses are increasingly becoming a fad and must-have accessories for  celebs and fashionistas. Everyday we can spot millions of non prescription glasses wearers and we are constantly fascinated by many noted film stars’ signature non prescription glasses.They instantly upgrade your look of modern,sexy, vintage or geek by wearing different styles of frames.

Any hot glasses/sunglasses /goggles frames you want can be found on Firmoo, and all are available for both prescription lenses and non-prescription lenses. Are you desperate to have a new look? Now here is the chance, Firmoo has launched a First Pair Free Program to people  worldwide. You will absolutely fall in love with the excellent quality, affordable prices, fashionable designs, fast delivery and the good service after trying them with paying shipping only! You even can get a refund/exchange if you are not satisfied with them. It's totally Risk free, so why not have a try? 

Three for 3

I have run 3 official half marathons in less than 12 months.  Each race I've improved my time.  I'm still as slow as a turtle, but I also have been running consistently for only 15 months so I give myself permission to suck at speed.

I flew to DC to run the inaugural Nike DC Women's Half Marathon.  It was a gorgeous morning, the effects of Boston's Marathon only 13 days prior were still fresh on our minds.  The crowds were amazing.  The spectators helped provide inspiration along the way.  My family was there to support me.

I run with Team In Training which is a division of the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society.  I lost my best friend 9 years ago today to Non-Hodgkins (a blood cancer) and run in her memory.  All the training, fundraising, running injuries were worth it to honor her.

I say this after each race and I mean it, "I'll keep running as long as I have the ability to place one foot in front of the other."

 Via