I am blessed.
But God didn't bless me with the most perfectly shaped brows.
I have unruly, no good, starting-to-turn-gray-too brows. They are thick, massive and grow like weeds. They are not symmetrical either. Fuckers.
I'd blame genetics on my lack of perfection, but I think I fucked them up years ago in high school when I let a friend of mine at an over night youth group outing tweeze them for the first time around 3AM. Let's just chalk that up to the pile of horrid teenage decisions I am known for.
When it comes to my eyebrows, I'd drop my savings account on them if I had to to keep them orderly. There are times to be frugal. When it comes to beauty, I splurge. I have to. I really, really have to.
So when I found a salon nearby that actually does threading and rumor had it they don't fuck things up, I was sold. Sold like a fly on poo. Like a whore on Sunset Blvd. Like white on rice, like...
Over the last 3 years I've been having them waxed because I didn't trust anyone who wasn't straight-up Persian to thread my brows. Those women always have the most amazing brows. Trust me.
I found a gem named Kimmy who did my brows today, and not only did she thread them to perfection, she used about 3 different types of tweezers to get those gnarly strays.
Funny how after $22+ el-tippo and some brow threading I feel confident in my appearance. So much so that I indulged in not one but TWO Skinny Cow ice cream bars for dinner. For dinner.
And now my self confidence is in the crapper, and I should have run an extra mile tonight. But at least when I did run, I had some good-as-crack looking brows.
"Hey, who's that random fat ass chic running in the n'hood? I don't know, but boy she's got some fan-freaking-tastic eyebrows."