Today my physical biorhythms were left to be desired. I got up on the wrong side of the bed. I stumbled into the kitchen and bruised my thigh against the counter. Any by bruise, I mean a gnarly looking purple-green, ominous marking on my thigh. Thank gawd bathing suit season has officially shut down. I knocked over my coffee and tripped on one of The Natives sending her in to a h-o-w-l of growl in annoyance with me. All of this happened before 9:00 a.m.
The physicality decline of my body didn't stop there. I was clutsy getting into my car to run errands, and I tripped on the curb getting out of the car later on. A girl can only have so many good days in a row before she does something completely asinine in public.
Today was my day.
Totally. My. Day.
As I went to check out and pay for a stupid pack of pens in the drug store, I had the back pocket of my purse wide open. Apparently, it had been open for a while and I didn't notice it until I grabbed my purse off my shoulder to reach in for my wallet. And there for all the world to see was a tampon hanging out of the pocket of my designer handbag. A designer tampon to go with my designer handbag. A big, fat, stubby tampon hanging out for all the men in the drug store to witness as I aimlessly shopped around for a pack of pens.
It doesn't beat the time my boss in college asked me for pen and I grabbed a tampon instead, though.
Totally channeled Bridget Jones today.